On inaugural eve, Obama’s most virulent foes want the celebration stopped

Eldon Bell, a retired Air Force officer and physician, is making no plans to see Barack Obama’s second inauguration, in part because Bell considers the president arrogant and dishonest, but more so because Bell is not yet persuaded that the swearing-in will occur at all.

“Whether I watch depends on who’s being inaugurated,” says Bell, 78. “If it’s this guy, probably not, because I don’t pay much attention to illegitimate things.”

At this late date, Bell and his fellow believers in the notion that Obama was born overseas or is otherwise ineligible to be president still expect some court somewhere to buy into one of their theories. After more than 100 court cases, no judge has.

Even after Obama convincingly won reelection despite four years of low popularity ratings, a sluggish economy and a highly motivated opposition, advocates of various counterfactual theories about the president — he’s a foreigner, he’s a Marxist, he’s a Muslim — say they’re sticking to their fight.

“This inauguration is a mistake and those who permit it to happen will have to live with their own consciences,” says Bell, a former Washingtonian who retired to South Dakota.

Most Americans have moved on from earlier dalliances with denials of the president’s biography. National opinion polls have shown increases over the past three years in the percentage of Americans who agree that Obama was born in the United States and that he is a Christian. But a persistent minority — between a tenth and a fifth in most polls — still believe he is Muslim, foreign-born or a socialist.

Those voters tend to be vehement opponents of Obama, and on Inauguration Day, they will not be at the party — and they’re still searching for ways to have the president declared illegitimate.

“Let’s face it, this is a man very deep into an ideology that is not American,” says the Rev. Clenard Childress, a New Jersey minister and antiabortion activist who says black and white voters alike returned Obama to office “to feel better about ourselves and get the guilt of racism off us.”

Childress says it’s 50-50 that Obama is a Muslim who was born in Kenya: “But what I really care about is do we have the same values? Do you believe in the sanctity of life? Do you believe in marriage as being between man and woman? And this president does not.”

Just because the election is over doesn’t mean the confrontations of the first term will end, Childress says. In addition to the fiscal battles on Capitol Hill, the minister says, social issues will keep Obama opponents fired up, starting with next month’s antiabortion rally on the Mall and continuing with court and political battles over same-sex marriage.

“There will never be more contentiousness than in the next two years,” he says. “I told my congregation: Just strap yourselves down, it’s going to be nasty.”

Those who monitor anti-Obama movements say the inauguration will do nothing to quiet the rapids. “The rhetoric since the election has actually gotten more vicious,” says Kevin Davidson, better known as “Dr. Conspiracy,” his handle on his Web site, Obama Conspiracy Theories, which keeps tabs on those who declare Obama’s presidency illegitimate.

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Asian stocks rise after Fed comments

HONG KONG: Asian shares were mostly higher Tuesday after US Federal Reserve chief Ben Bernanke reassured markets that easing measures were set to stay in place, with Tokyo leading regional bourses higher.

Traders also mulled a warning from US President Barack Obama to Republican rivals not to delay raising the debt ceiling, as the next budget fight took shape in Washington following the battle to avert the "fiscal cliff".

Tokyo put on 1.25 per cent in early trade boosted by the weak yen, which makes exporters' products cheaper, and as dealers hoped for more aggressive easing from the Bank of Japan to lift the world's third-biggest economy.

"The declining yen continues to pull investors off the fence, while earnings expectations from US companies, as well as for a broader global economic rebound, remain relatively firm," said SMBC Nikko Securities general manager of equities Hiroichi Nishi.

Hong Kong was up 0.15 per cent and Shanghai rose 0.39 per cent, adding to strong gains on Monday. Sydney put on 0.16 per cent but Seoul slipped 0.52 per cent.

There was no clear lead from Wall Street, with the Dow Jones Industrial Average gaining 0.14 per cent, but the broad-based S&P 500 falling 0.09 per cent and the Nasdaq Composite shedding 0.26 per cent.

Bernanke indicated on Monday, after Asian markets had closed, that the Fed's latest round of quantitative easing would continue.

He told an audience at the University of Michigan that "while we've made some progress there is still quite a ways to go", in comments reported by Dow Jones Newswires.

His comments were a relief to markets, dealers said, after minutes from the December meeting of Fed policymakers showed they were divided over how long the central bank should continue its $85-billion-a-month bond-buying programme.

In Washington, the next stage of a drawn-out fiscal battle was taking shape as Obama warned Republican lawmakers against using the debt ceiling as a "bargaining chip".

He said a failure to raise the borrowing limit by late February would sow financial chaos and send markets into a tailspin, adding that: "Investors around the world will ask if the United States of America is in fact a safe bet."

Investors are also optimistic ahead of the release of fourth-quarter growth figures for China on Friday, which it is hoped will confirm that the world's number two economy has picked up following a slowdown, analysts said.

On foreign exchange markets, the dollar remained firm against the yen in early Asian trade, at 89.48 yen against 89.45 yen in New York Monday afternoon.

The euro fetched 119.72 yen and $1.3379, slightly up from 119.65 yen and $1.3376 in US trade.

Oil prices fell. New York's main contract, light sweet crude for delivery in February, shed nine cents to $94.05 a barrel and Brent North Sea crude for February delivery dipped nine cents to $111.79.

Gold was at $1,671.86 at 0300 GMT compared with $1,668.39 late Monday.

- AFP/ck

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National Conference may induct Congress MLAs in J&K Cabinet

NEW DELHI: Jammu and Kashmir chief minister Omar Abdullah can expand and reshuffle his ministry on Tuesday following a prod from AICC president Sonia Gandhi on Sunday evening. Congress leaders like Saifuddin Soz have been asking for more representation from their party in the Omar-led National Conference coalition government.

Abdullah had dropped two Congress ministers, G A Saroori and Peerzada Mohammad Sayeed, on charges of corruption. Saroori, a Congress MLA from Kishtwar, was charged for an impersonation fraud in the medical entrance test that his daughter gave and Peerzada was accused of helping his step-son copy in Class X exams. They were exonerated by the CBI and a state-level investigation team.

Sonia asked for the inclusion of more Congress legislators in the J&K House. State governor NN Vohra rushed to Jammu from New Delhi to make arrangements for the oath ceremony of new ministers at 4pm on Tuesday. Soz and Ghulam Nabi Azad had briefed Sonia about the unrest in the Congress camp after berths meant for them were not filled.

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"Fantastic" New Flying Frog Found—Has Flappy Forearms

Scientists have stumbled across a new species of flying frog—on the ground.

While hiking a lowland forest in 2009, not far from Ho Chi Minh City (map), Vietnam, "we came across a huge green frog, sitting on a log," said Jodi Rowley, an amphibian biologist at the Australian Museum in Sydney and lead author of a new study on the frog.

Rowley later discovered that the 3.5-inch-long (9-centimeter-long) creature is a relatively large new type of flying frog, a group known for its ability to "parachute" from tree to tree thanks to special aerodynamic adaptations, such as webbed feet, Rowley said. (Also see "'Vampire Flying Frog' Found; Tadpoles Have Black Fangs.")

Rowley dubbed the new species Helen's flying frog, in honor of her mother, Helen Rowley, "who has steadfastly supported her only child trekking through the forests of Southeast Asia in search of frogs," according to a statement.

The newfound species—there are 80 types of flying frogs—is also "one of the most flying frogs of the flying frogs," Rowley said, "in that it's got huge hands and feet that are webbed all the way to the toepad."

"Females even have flappy skin on their forearms to glide," added Rowley, who has received funding from the National Geographic Committee on Research and Exploration. (National Geographic News is part of the National Geographic Society.) "The females are larger and heavier than males, so the little extra flaps probably don't make much of a difference," she said.

As Rowley wrote on her blog, "At first it may seem strange that such a fantastic and obvious frog could escape discovery until now—less than 100 kilometers [60 miles] from an urban centre with over nine million people."

Yet these tree dwellers can easily escape notice—they spend most of their time in the canopy, she said.

Flying Frog On the Edge

Even so, Helen's flying frog won't be able to hide from development near Ho Chi Minh City, which may encroach on its existing habitats.

So far, only five individuals have been found in two patches of lowland forest hemmed in by rice paddies in southern Vietnam, Rowley said. The animals can probably tolerate a little bit of disturbance as long as they have large trees and temporary pools, she added.

But lowland forests are among the most threatened habitats in the world, mostly because they're so accessible to people, and thus chosen for logging and development. (Get the facts on deforestation.)

"While Helen's flying frog has only just been discovered by biologists," Rowley wrote, "unfortunately this species, like many others, is under great threat from ongoing habitat loss and degradation."

The new flying frog study was published in December 2012 in the Journal of Herpetology.

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Armstrong Admits Doping in Tour, Sources Say

Lance Armstrong today admitted to Oprah Winfrey that he used performance enhancing drugs to win the Tour de France, sources told ABC News.

A goverment source tells ABC News that Armstrong is now talking with authorities about paying back some of the US Postal Service money from sponsoring his team. He is also talking to authorities about confessing and naming names, giving up others involved in illegal doping. This could result in a reduction of his lifetime ban, according to the source, if Armstrong provides substantial and meaningful information.

Armstrong made the admission in what sources describe as an emotional interview with Winfrey to air on "Oprah's Next Chapter" on Jan. 17.

The 90-minute interview at his home in Austin, Texas, was Armstrong's first since officials stripped him of his world cycling titles in response to doping allegations.

Word of Armstrong's admission comes after a Livestrong official said that Armstrong apologized today to the foundation's staff ahead of his interview.

The disgraced cyclist gathered with about 100 Livestrong Foundation staffers at their Austin headquarters for a meeting that included social workers who deal directly with patients as part of the group's mission to support cancer victims.

Armstrong's "sincere and heartfelt apology" generated lots of tears, spokeswoman Katherine McLane said, adding that he "took responsibility" for the trouble he has caused the foundation.

Riccardo S. Savi/Getty Images|Ray Tamarra/Getty Images

Lance Armstrong Stripped of Tour de France Titles Watch Video

Lance Armstrong Doping Charges: Secret Tapes Watch Video

McLane declined to say whether Armstrong's comments included an admission of doping, just that the cyclist wanted the staff to hear from him in person rather than rely on second-hand accounts.

Armstrong then took questions from the staff.

Armstrong's story has never changed. In front of cameras, microphones, fans, sponsors, cancer survivors -- even under oath -- Lance Armstrong hasn't just denied ever using performance enhancing drugs, he has done so in an indignant, even threatening way.

Armstrong, 41, was stripped of his seven Tour de France titles and banned from the sport for life by the U.S. Anti-Doping Agency in October 2012, after allegations that he benefited from years of systematic doping, using banned substances and receiving illicit blood transfusions.

"Lance Armstrong has no place in cycling and he deserves to be forgotten in cycling," Pat McQuaid, the president of the International Cycling Union, said at a news conference in Switzerland announcing the decision. "This is a landmark day for cycling."

The U.S. Anti-Doping Agency issued a 200-page report Oct. 10 after a wide-scale investigation into Armstrong's alleged use of performance-enhancing substances.

Armstrong won the Tour de France from 1999 to 2005.

According to a source, speaking to ABC News, a representative of Armstrong's once offered to make a donation estimated around $250,000 to the agency, as "60 Minutes Sports" on Showtime first reported.

Lance Armstrong's attorney Tim Herman denied it. "No truth to that story," Herman said. "First Lance heard of it was today. He never made any such contribution or suggestion."

Armstrong, who himself recovered from testicular cancer, created the Lance Armstrong Foundation (now known as the LIVESTRONG Foundation) to help people with cancer cope, as well as foster a community for cancer awareness. Armstrong resigned late last year as chairman of the LIVESTRONG Foundation, which raised millions of dollars in the fight against cancer.

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Bloomberg wants to change the GOP

NEW YORK — Michael Bloomberg, America’s most prominent and deep-pocketed advocate for gun control, would rather rehabilitate Republicans than oust them.

“Somebody got them the way they are now,” the mayor of New York said in a recent interview as he sat in the bullpen offices of City Hall, surrounded by a buzzing staff, blinking Bloomberg terminals and clocks telling the same time in each of the five boroughs. “Why can’t you change them?”

On Monday, Bloomberg will headline a summit on guns at the Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health in Baltimore, another opportunity for the outspoken mayor to deliver an indictment of Washington’s failure to do anything meaningful on the issue. Although the Democrat-turned-Republican-


turned-indepen­dent says he practices a “noble and practical” brand of post-partisan politics, when it comes to gun laws, he is more aligned with one party than the other.

Democrats in the White House and in Congress are working closely with his advocacy group, Mayors Against Illegal Guns, to enact his gun-control agenda. And Republicans, especially those in the House, don’t seem the least bit interested.

“Oh sure,” Bloomberg said, he would blame Republicans if they blocked new gun-control legislation in the House. “But having said that, I won’t let the Democrats off the hook.” He added that when Democrats “were in power, they didn’t do it,” and President Obama “campaigned on an ­assault-weapons ban and he didn’t do it, so spare me.”

It’s not clear how much longer the mayor’s idiosyncratic who-needs-political-parties approach will apply when it comes to gun control.

After the massacre of schoolchildren in Newtown, Conn., a collection of progressive groups and Democratic lawmakers, including, most recently, former Arizona congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords, have aggressively entered the debate. (“And so we’re not going to be the star,” Bloomberg said. “My interest is in having this done. I don’t need to get credit for it.”) That still leaves Bloomberg with a significant distinction: He’s a multibillionaire who can immediately reshape the landscape of gun politics with his money. His hope is that he can break the GOP of what he sees as its National Rifle Association addiction by using his considerable resources to promote gun laws with which many NRA members will agree.

“I’m going to prove a counterweight” to the NRA, said Bloomberg, who spent about $10 million in five congressional and statewide races against NRA-
supported candidates last year, winning four of those contests. “It seemed effective, and I’m certainly going to take a good, hard look at next time. . . . You can organize people, I can write checks.”

Andrew Arulanandam, a spokesman for the NRA, said that although there were “billions of reasons to take him seriously,” the organization viewed Bloomberg’s handpicked races as an attempt to “manufacture a story line.” The NRA, he said, “played in hundreds of races at the federal level and thousands of races at the state legislative level.” As far as Bloomberg’s effort to peel off Republicans, Arulanandam did not seem particularly worried. “He is free to spend his money or waste it however he sees fit,” the spokesman said.

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Venezuelan officials send mixed messages on Chavez

CARACAS: Officials sent mixed signals Sunday about the condition of cancer-stricken Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez, fueling growing political uncertainty in the oil-rich country.

Chavez, who has not been seen in public for more than a month, is "fighting for his life," former vice president Elias Jaua said.

"The situation is complex and delicate, but it is true that Hugo Chavez has fought and is fighting for his life," said Jaua, who was in office from January 2010 until October.

Communications Minister Ernesto Villegas, however, indicated that the usually outspoken and ever-present leftist leader, hospitalized in Cuba following his fourth cancer operation last month, was doing better.

"Despite his delicate health state since his complex surgery on December 11, his general health has improved in recent days," Villegas said in a statement read on radio and television.

He said the president's previously disclosed severe pulmonary infection was "under control" but that he still required treatment for "respiratory failure."

Chavez, whose OPEC-member nation controls the world's largest proven oil reserves, has been out of sight since leaving for Cuba for the latest round of treatment in the 18 months since his condition was made public.

Uncertainty about his status has fueled speculation about his prospects for a full recovery -- and his political future.

The latest updates followed a denial from Chavez's brother Adan Saturday that the 58-year-old was in a coma. Instead, he said the Venezuelan leader was responding "well" to treatment and making progress on a daily basis.

Chavez's anointed heir, Vice President Nicolas Maduro, met with his ailing boss late Saturday.

During his trip, Maduro also met with Cuban President Raul Castro along with Venezuelan Parliament President Diosdado Cabello, Energy Minister Rafael Ramirez and Attorney General Cilia Flores.

A slew of leftist leaders and Venezuelan officials have also come to Chavez's bedside, with Brazil's former president Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva planning a trip to Havana in late January, according to his spokesman.

During his 2003-2010 rule, Lula, himself a cancer survivor, built a strong relationship with the Chavez government in power since 1999.

On Thursday, the government was forced to postpone the president's scheduled inauguration, as it became clear that Chavez could not attend. Authorities insist the Venezuelan constitution allows him to take the oath of office at a later time.

But the opposition has objected, calling for a medical board to review the absent leader's health -- a demand rejected by the Supreme Court, which said the delayed swearing-in was constitutional.

- AFP/ck

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Declare Amritsar 'dry city', says Navjot Kaur Sidhu

AMRITSAR: Chief parliamentary secretary Navjot Kaur Sidhu on Sunday demanded from chief minister Parkash Singh Badal to declare Amritsar as " dry city". Kaur said that she had met Badal, urging him to declare holy city of Amritsar as "dry city" keeping in mind the city's holiness due to presence of various religious places, the most prominent being the Golden Temple.

Joint drives to check corruption: The Punjab vigilance bureau will carry out joint inspections with chief vigilance officers of other departments as an outreach measure for participation of people to check corruption. Suresh Arora, chief director-cum-DGP, vigilance bureau, said the bureau would actively seek and encourage cooperation of public to report instances of corruption and their identity would be kept secret.

3 jawans held for flesh trade: As Jalandhar police claimed to have busted a flesh trade racket after raiding a brothel, three Army jawans were also arrested. A woman has also been arrested for running the brothel. According to police a MIG flat was raided in Urban Estate locality after getting a tip off that Kamlesh Rani was running a brothel from her flat. Three women and three men were arrested. Later, the cops came to know that the "customers" were Army jawans and they told the police that they were serving in Army supply corps. All six accused were arrested under Immoral Trafficking Act.

BJP polls on Jan 15: Punjab unit of Bharatiya Janata Party will hold its elections at the state headquarters on January 15. Nominations will be filed from 10 am to 12 noon, scrutiny will be done till 12.30 pm, and candidates can withdraw their papers by 2 pm. Former MP and BJP's national spokesman Ram Nath Kovind will be the central election observer. Party national vice-president and state in charge of organizational affairs Shanta Kumar and BJP national general secretary and JP Nadda will be present.

'Don't attend Maha Kumbh Mela': The All India Sikh Student Federation (AISSF) on Sunday objected to the decision of the apex religious body of the community, SGPC to participate in the Maha Kumbh Mela, saying that it is against the "basic tenets" of the religion. "Forgetting one's own glorious past and following the tenets of other religion is not acceptable," AISSF president Karnail Singh Peer Mohammad said in a statement in Amritsar.

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Pictures: Civil War Shipwreck Revealed by Sonar

Photograph by Jesse Cancelmo

A fishing net, likely only decades old, drapes over machinery that once connected the Hatteras' pistons to its paddle wheels, said Delgado.

From archived documents, the NOAA archaeologist learned that Blake, the ship's commander, surrendered as his ship was sinking. "It was listing to port, [or the left]," Delgado said. The Alabama took the wounded and the rest of the crew and put them in irons.

The officers were allowed to keep their swords and wander the deck as long as they promised not to lead an uprising against the Alabama's crew, he added.

From there, the Alabama dropped off their captives in Jamaica, leaving them to make their own way back to the U.S.

Delgado wants to dig even further into the crew of the Hatteras. He'd like see if members of the public recognize any of the names on his list of crew members and can give him background on the men.

"That's why I do archaeology," he said.

(Read about other Civil War battlefields in National Geographic magazine.)

Published January 11, 2013

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Golden Globes Live Blog: Lewis, Chastain Win

Tina Fey and Amy Poehler: The women of the night. Credit: Paul Drinkwater/NBC/AP Photo.

10:51 p.m. ET: And best actor in a drama award goes to … Daniel Day-Lewis for “Lincoln.” “Are you sure there’s room for another ex-president on the stage?” he jokes.

10:48 p.m. ET: Jessica Chastain wins for “Zero Dark Thirty.” She calls out director Kathryn Bigelow: “I can’t help but compare my character of Maya to you. … When you make a film that allows your film to allow your character to disobey the conventions of Hollywood, you’ve done more for women in cinema than you take credit for.”

10:47 p.m. ET: It’s time for best actress in a drama — George Clooney’s presenting.

10:41 p.m. ET: Another win for “Les Miserables” — the movie wins the Globe for best comedy or musical.

10:31 p.m. ET: “Les Mis” star Hugh Jackman nabs the Globe for best actor in a movie musical or comedy. He saves his biggest thank you for his wife: “Baby, thank you for always being right.”

10:26 p.m. ET: So apparently Jodie Foster is not retiring. Backstage, when asked by reporters “Are you retiring?’, she said “no, not retiring.” What was she talking about then?

10:22 p.m. ET: Major night for “Girls” — second season premiere is tonight and the HBO hit just won best comedy. Dunham grabs the trophy and screams. “It took a village to raise this very demented child,” she says. “I also promised myself that if I ever got this chance, I would thank Chad Lowe.”

10:17 p.m. ET: Next major award of the night goes to Ben Affleck for “Argo” — best director. (Take that, Oscars.) Steven Spielberg does not look happy.

10:11 p.m. ET: And it sounds like Foster just retired from acting. She says she’s not returning to this stage or any stage: “It’s just that from now on, I may be holding a different talking stick.” People in the audience are wiping away tears, notably Kate Hudson.

10:07 p.m. ET: Foster almost made a huge public statement about her sexuality. Instead, she said she’s single, and she “already did my coming out in the stone age.” “Now, apparently, I’m told that every celebrity is expected to honor the details of their private life with a press conference … You guys might be surprised, but I’m not Honey Boo Boo Child,” she said. “If you had been a public figure from the time that you were a toddler … then maybe you too might value privacy above all else. Privacy.” But she specifically thanked her partner Cydney Bernard, with whom she has two kids.

Credit: Obtained by ABC.

10:06 p.m. ET: Foster accepting her award: “Trust me, 47 years in the film business is a long time. … but tonight, I feel like the prom queen.”

10:02 p.m. ET: Robert Downey Jr. gives a somewhat incomprehensible intro for Jodie Foster, who’s being given the Cecil B. DeMille award for her decades in film.

10:00 p.m. ET: Despite her silence on her relationship status, Taylor Swift WILL NOT be spared: “You know what Taylor Swift, you stay away from Michael J. Fox’s son,” Fey slurs, ignoring Poehler’s objections. “She needs some me time to learn about herself.”

9:58 p.m. ET: Fey and Poehler come back to the mic (finally!) holding drinks. “Everybody’s getting a little lose now that we’re all losers,” Fey says. “Congratulations, Lena. Glad that we got you through middle school.” Poehler says, “Look how drunk Glenn Close is,” Close flails/dances in her chair. Fantastic.

9:52 p.m. ET: Lena Dunham wins best actress in a comedy for “Girls”! She calls Judd Apatow “the greatest honorary ’Girl.’” “This award is for everyone who feels like there wasn’t a place for her,” she says. “This show made a space for me.”

9:50 p.m. ET: Aziz Ansari is pretending the cast of “Downton Abbey” got him high. And Amy Poehler is in George Clooney’s lap. It’s great.

9:46 p.m. ET: “Brave” wins best animated movie.

9:45 p.m. ET: Oh, Sacha Baron Cohen. He’s subbing for Ricky Gervais with an insult-heavy presentation of the nominated animated movies. (Speaking of, where are Fey and Poehler?!)

9:38 p.m. ET: “Homeland” wins again. Claire Danes scores best actress in a TV drama. “I want to thank the other women in this category who are all so badass, so brilliant,” she says. She thanks her costume designer who apparently took her pants out every week while Danes was pregnant last season.

9:35 p.m. ET: The award goes to “Amour,” which picked up a slew of Oscar nominations too.

9:33 p.m. ET: Arnold Schwarzenegger and Sylvester Stallone look hilarious stuffed into suits. They’re presenting the award for best foreign film.

9:27 p.m. ET: It’s a good night for Don Cheadle. His Showtime show “House of Lies” returns for its second season tonight and he just won a Golden Globe for best actor in a TV comedy.

FULL LIST: 2013 Golden Globes Winners

9:23 p.m. ET: Globe for best original screenplay goes to Quentin Tarantino — that’s two trophies so far for “Django Unchained.” He calls the award a “damn surprise” and thanks his friends for listening to him read his scenes. “I don’t want input,” he says. “When I read it to you, I hear it through your ears.”

9:15 p.m. ET: Globe for best supporting actress in a movie (drama) goes to Anne Hathaway for “Les Miserables.” “Blergh,” she says, clearly flustered. “Thanks for that word, Tina.” She also pays tribute to fellow nominee Sally Field for inspiring her to stay in the industry.

Credit: Jordan Strauss/Invision/AP Photo.

9:12 p.m. ET: Best supporting actor in a TV series or movie goes to …  Ed Harris for “Game Change.”

9:06 p.m. ET: Jennifer Lawrence wins best actress in a movie (comedy or musical) for “Silver Linings Playbook.” “Oh what does it say?” she asks, looking at the trophy. “I beat Meryl.” She means Streep, of course.

9:05 p.m. ET: Camera pans to Tommy Lee Jones who is not at all amused by Wiig and Ferrell.

9:03 p.m. ET: Kristen Wiig and Will Ferrell are doing a hilarious bit about how they know absolutely nothing about any of the best actress movie nominees. Of Judy Dench in “Best Exotic Marigold Hotel”: “And she’s on that tractor with the marigolds everywhere.”

9:01 p.m. ET: Poehler gushes over “Hillary’s husband.” Fey is still in drag from her bit earlier. They’re amazing and we want to see more of them.

9:00 p.m. ET: Clinton’s presenting a clip of “Lincoln.” Now this makes sense. “We’re all here tonight because he did it,” he says of Lincoln’s battle to end slavery.

8:59 p.m. ET: What, Bill Clinton’s here?! He gets a standing ovation.

8:55 p.m. ET: Kevin Costner wins for best actor in a miniseries or movie for “Hatfields & McCoys.”

8:48 p.m. ET: Adele scoops up the Globe for best original song for the latest Bond theme, “Skyfall.” Her reaction: “Oh my God! … Honestly, I came for a night out, with my friend Ida, we’re new mums … I literally came for a night out.”

Credit: Jordan Strauss/Invision/AP Photo.

8:44 p.m. ET: “Life of Pi” wins for best original score … but J-Lo’s nude dress steals the spotlight. Just like her nipple almost did at last year’s Oscars.

8:41 p.m. ET: “Argo’s” real life inspiration, Tony Mendez, joined John Goodman to introduce a clip of the film, which is up for five Globes.

8:36 p.m. ET: Well that was awkward. Some sort of camera malfunction messed up Salma Hayek and Paul Rudd’s best TV drama intro. “Homeland” wins! Executive producer Alex Gansa: “Thanks to everyone who’s been watching ‘Homeland,’ and to those who haven’t, allow me to spoil it for you.”

8:33 p.m. ET: Best actor in a TV drama goes to … Damian Lewis for “Homeland.” Considering it’s a fan and critic favorite right now, not a huge surprise.

Credit: Jordan Strauss/Invision/AP Photo.

8:28 p.m. ET: Hollywood Foreign Press Association president Dr. Aida Takla-O’Reilly disses Jeffrey Katzenberg for never learning her name, asks Bradley Cooper to “call me maybe.” Amazing.

8:21 p.m. ET: And Julianne Moore wins for best actress in a miniseries or movie. “Oh my gosh, my children will be so relieved,” she says. She gives a shout out to Tina Fey and Katie Couric — “two people who made a difference in the 2008 election.”

Credit: Kevin WInter/Getty Images.

8:18 p.m. ET: “Game Change” scores best miniseries or movie. Somewhere, Sarah Palin is probably shaking her fist.

8:14 p.m. ET: We’ll use the commercial break to declare that Poehler and Fey had an absolutely amazing opening bit. Bravo.

8:12 p.m. ET: Second award of the night, best supporting actress in TV: Maggie Smith for “Downton Abbey.” According to Poehler and Fey’s drinking game, you should drink take off a piece of clothing now.

RELATED: Poehler and Fey Reveal Their Golden Globes Drinking Game

8:10 p.m. ET: And the award for best supporting actor in a movie goes to … Christoph Waltz for “Django Unchained.” Hint that he’ll win the Oscar for that part too?

8:07 p.m. ET: Fey almost reprised her Sarah Palin impression while into-ing Julianne Moore but appears to have lost it. Dang.

8:05 p.m. ET: Poehler: “Meryl Streep is not here tonight, she has the flu. And I hear she’s amazing in it.”

8:04 p.m. ET: Fey had a great one for Anne Hathaway and “Les Mis”: “I have not seen someone so totally alone and abandoned like that since you were on stage with James Franco at the Oscars.”

8:03 p.m. ET: Poehler on Kathryn Bigelow and the “Zero Dark Thirty” torture controversy: “When it comes to torture, I trust the lady who spend three years married to James Cameron.” WOW.

8:02 p.m. ET: Oh and they’re not going to be offensive like past host Ricky Gervais. Poehler: ”When you run afoul of the Hollywood Foreign Press, they make you host this show two more times.”

8:00 p.m. ET: Fey and Poehler did an outfit change before stepping up to the mic. Poehler threw the first jab of the night: “You can smell the pills from here. ”

7:44 p.m. ET: “Scandal” and “Django Unchained” star Kerry Washington never Googles herself. She feels like it’s bad for her health. Now you know. Also, she looks gorgeous in Miu Miu.

7:40 p.m. ET: @AngiesRightLeg has met its match: Halle Berry struck a leggy pose on the red carpet in an unfortunate one-shoulder gown.

Angie's Right Leg, meet Halle's. Credit: Steve Granitz/Getty Images.

7:33 p.m. ET: It’s an “ER” reunion! George Clooney and Julianna Margulies just hugged on the red carpet.

7:28 p.m. ET: Best song nominee Adele revealed that she actually had to be convinced to write the theme for “Skyfall.” “It’s a big responsibility doing a Bond song,” she said. “I didn’t want to let everybody down by doing it.”

7:19 p.m. ET: Julianne Moore looks stunning in black and white Tom Ford. She’s up for best actress in a TV movie for “Game Change.”

7:18 p.m. ET: “Mad Men” star Jon Hamm on the best part of playing Don Draper: “Well it’s always fun to play drunk, because if you forget your lines you’re just like, ‘Uh, well, I’m in character.’”

PHOTOS: The 2013 Golden Globes Red Carpet

7:15 p.m. ET: Taylor Swift wore a mermaid-cut eggplant gown … and did not at all talk about what happened with her latest boyfriend, Harry Styles. Sigh.

Credit: Credit: Steve Granitz/Getty Images.

7:14 p.m. ET: Hugh Jackman revealed the “horrible” way he shed weight quickly before filming “Les Mis”: “I lost about 35 pounds in 36 hours before the first scene. I didn’t drink any liquids whatsoever.”

7:07 p.m. ET: Another fashion miss: Jennifer Lawrence. It looks like she stole Madonna’s cone bra and cut off the straps.

Credit: Steve Granitz/Getty Images.

7:02 p.m. ET: “Zero Dark Thirty” star Jessica Chastain diverged from the major trends of the night — nude, black and white, and red — in a powder blue Calvin Klein Collection gown. The plunging bodice looks a bit like a sack.

Credit: Steve Granitz/Getty Images.

6:57 p.m. ET: E!’s mani-cam has become a source of contention. While some actresses happily showed off their nails on the tiny red carpet, Aziz Ansari refused to stick his hand in the diorama-like box.

FULL COVERAGE: The 2013 Awards Season

6:56 p.m. ET: Olivia Munn has a new perspective on newsrooms now that she’s on Aaron Sorkin’s “The Newsroom.” “I think [our show] makes other newsrooms seem pretty easygoing,” she said.

6:42 p.m. ET: Julia Louis-Dreyfus said she had a “little tiny piece of cake” to celebrate her birthday. “Look, this is a corset,” she said, pointing to her Vera Wang dress. “I can’t mess around.” Though she’s up for best actress in a TV comedy, she thinks she’ll lose. “I hope that Lena Dunham or Amy Poehler have their speech ready,” she said.

6:38 p.m. ET: Hosts Tina Fey and Amy Poehler are encouraging their guests to get liquored up. “It’s a party and we want it to remain a party,” Fey said. Both have awesome outfits — a strapless black and white gown for Fey and a low cut tuxedo for Poehler.

6:31 p.m. ET: “Girls” star and Globes nominee Lena Dunham said her stylist gave her very specific instructions about adjusting her dress because “my breasts have a tendency to shove my dress to the right.” She looks lovely in chocolate brown, off-the-shoulder gown.

Lena Dunham. Credit: Steve Granitz/Getty Images.

6:28 p.m. ET: Best actress in a TV comedy nominee Zooey Deschanel showed off her film strip nail art on the red carpet. Very Hollywood.

Zooey Deschanel. Credit: Steve Granitz/Getty Images.

6:22 p.m. ET: Another stunning new mom: Megan Fox. She admitted that husband Brian Austin Green picks most of her dresses.

6:16 p.m. ET: The first surprise of Golden Globes: How utterly amazing Claire Danes looks. She gave birth a month ago and has a flat, practically concave stomach. She tried on her red Versace dress for the first time last night but admitted she’s “been in sweatpants for quite a while.” She added, “I hope I don’t leak.”

RELATED: Claire Danes Flaunts Post-Baby Body at the Golden Globes

Claire Danes dressed her insane post-baby body in Versace. Credit: Steve Granitz/Getty Images.

6:14 p.m. ET: Amy Adams, up for best supporting actress for “The Master,” looks angelic in a Marchesa in a color she called ballet pink. “This is mommy at work,” she said to her daughter back at home.

Amy Adams in Marchesa. Credit: Steve Granitz/Getty Images.

6:12 p.m. ET: Julianne Hough opted for a creepy crawly accessory — her earrings are made out of actual beetles.

6:02 p.m. ET: For Julia Louis-Dreyfus, this Globes is extra special — today is her 52nd birthday and she’s up for best actress in a TV comedy for “Veep.” “Today I’m either a year older & I’m gonna lose a Golden Globe OR at least I’m nominated & I’m not dead yet,” she wrote on her WhoSay page.

6:00 p.m. ET: It’s here, the night that Hollywood has been steeling its liver for: The Golden Globe Awards, which are almost always a raucous time because the Hollywood Foreign Press keeps the bar open throughout the ceremony. We’ll be chronicling all the jokes, insults, red carpet highlights — and of course, the winners — right here. Keep refreshing for the latest updates.

PHOTOS: 2013 Golden Globe Nominees

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